Living with Roommates: Housing Advice for Couples
I’ve Moved On, So Why Won’t My Family?
The Basic Rules of Online Dating
Dating Tips For Introverts
Do Opposites Really Attract?
Blast from the Past: Retro Dating Tips from the 1930s
Do You Make Time For Yourself?
Don’t Date Guys at the Gym
The Dating Site For Stoners

Beyond that, Jason, I’m not sure what on my blog caused the ad hominem attack (“After reading a couple of your blog entries it’s hard to even take your posts seriously now. Hell, in one of your entries you even admitted to contradicting what you say about the men you want with what your actions portray.”). In my blog, I’m trying to examine my own feelings and behavior in the course of looking for a post-divorce relationship. My basic philosophy is to follow the Golden Rule, which has a lot of corrolaries, including honesty. If you’ve followed my blog, you’ve seen that I don’t reflexly blame or praise either sex (or myself or the other person), rather I try to dig beneath the surface to understand behavior. I’m not sure which particular post you’re referring to, but knowing myself and the fact that I try very hard not to play games, I suspect that the context was one in which I felt my behavior could be misinterpreted–sometimes I criticize myself for not saying precisely and completely what I mean, which is hard to do even though I’m a pretty direct person–or I thought my actions could give me some insight into my true desires. Happy to discuss further if you want to point out which post you meant, and we can do so by email or on my blog if you think this thread is off-topic here. Your call.

136Wudang March 21, 2012 at 11:11 am
“I think what’s missing from this discussion is the fact that Emileigh is not some hussy who’s the town slut. She is behaving in a way that is reinforced by the culture. She’s considered highly desirable by men and is high status at her college. She grew up in an era that told her that the sexual double standard is invalid. She may well have taken a sex ed class in high school that encouraged her to explore her sexuality. Like everyone else at college, she probably believes that a large percentage of women are hooking up, and she was no doubt comforted by that fact.

Emileigh is a product of the last 50 years of feminist programming post-Sexual Revolution. It’s surprising more women don’t participate. I imagine that some of it was bad luck, some was naivete, some was weakness. She’s miserable, but she’s not blaming anyone but herself. Which is more than I can say for some unhappy campers in this SMP.”

This is why I have a very hard time slut shaming. I find her choices perfectly reasonable under the circumstances.

A large part of the difficulty of breaking this habit is to leave without the dopamine rush of new thrilling sex partners, the oxytocin boost of affectionate physical contact and the good feelings of validation from the attention of men she gets through hooking up and through being perceived as a potential hookup. So what can be done about that?